Going to Hillsong LA yesterday was amazing. I was so blown
away by how much excellence, culture and atmosphere that was taking place. For
a church that’s only been doing services for 8 months what I saw was majestic.
The grace of God is truly something special. What I love about LA so far is
that it’s a church built around the concept of team. It doesn’t feel like it revolves
around 1 person. Hence why I believe the culture and atmosphere is where it’s
at. Every service feels like a Sydney Sunday night 7pm service. That is
amazing! What’s crazy is, the best is yet to come! I believe this church and
this atmosphere is what’s going to change a city. Just in one service I saw
dozens of people respond to the tug of God on their hearts. That is amazing!
While church is fun and exciting it’s also hard work. There’s so much need!
Serving in the 7pm service felt like serving at Conference. Always looking and
catering to “the one.” Being intentional; not just telling but showing; helping
people find seats; creating seats where there are none. Ultimately looking
after the entire experience to make sure that everyone who walks through those
doors feels “Welcomed Home.”
In the midst of all of that I couldn’t help but develop
feelings of nervousness, fear and anxiety. This is a huge transition. I barely
have any money. I’m in debt. I’ve had to leave so many people I deeply love and care
for. I’ve turned down jobs so I can volunteer with a cause I believe in. Some
days I feel more excitement than my body can stand. Other days I want to crawl
in the corner or go back to Texas or Sydney. But I can’t. I’ve burned the
bridge. I’ve chosen to go all in and trust God in new ways like never before. I
need Him. Oh how I need Him. So desperately bad. I’m in way over my head. There
is no sandbar to stand on. I’m in the deep away from every form of security I
could depend on. But this feeling, as scary as it is, is the reason why I
came to LA. I wanted to feel uncomfortable. I wanted to trust God for things
that were way outside my capacity. I wanted to depend on God in ways that I
couldn’t in Texas or Sydney. I believe I’ll be trusting and believing God for
bigger things than accommodation or jobs one day, but to get there I need to
grow my faith capacity. Where is my hope? Where is my trust? Often a lot of
those things are easier said than done which is why I pray this transition will
bring more of my head knowledge into real life miracles. As stated before, I’m
in way over my head. I have no idea how any of this is going to work out or how
I’m going to manage everything. Finances scare me, but I look to God to make a
way. I’m believing that the miracles and provision that God provides in this
season for me will not only bless my life but in return, will bless, encourage
and build the faith of others. I’m believing for a season of tremendous fruit
marked by undeniable grace. I feel so out of my ability and comfort zone but as
they say, “your grace abounds in deepest waters.” Father thank you that I am a
product of grace. I pray you would use this season to expand your grace in me.
That it would rule and conquer every bit of self and would lead to an
outpouring of grace to those around me.
